I hope that you had a relaxing holiday! I’m ready to tackle the next few weeks so that I can mentally prepare for 2017. Tis the season for reflection and setting goals. So let’s take a look at Tuesday Truths to see how we can jump start the new year.
Sometimes when you set goals and not meet them, you wonder if they were too lofty or question if you have the stamina to reach them. What’s important is to realize that you need to set your goals that motivate you to achieve them vs make you more frustrated. Here are a few tips that you can use so that you can make those goals achievable as well as keep you moving towards the bigger picture.
With the new year comes a fresh start and there are times when we take risks to shake things up a bit so how do you make a risky move less risky? Before you jump into the deep end, you can do “life design interviews” to see if a change in careers is really in the cards for you. Something I probably should have done when I had my quarter life crisis!
Women have a more challenging environment in our professional careers because it’s not the social norm to have a life that includes family and professional achievement all rolled into one. We are questioned about our priorities of having children over the financial bottom line for the companies where we work. It’s a time in our lives when we start to question how do we prioritize? How does this connect with our personal achievements and goals? Ambition isn’t a dirty word. It’s also important to recognize that women have complicated roles in society and when we’re placed in positions where men are the norm, there are societal pressures that put women in a bind. We are constantly asserting ourselves while trying to please everyone else.
It’s been 2 weeks since the Election and I’m still recovering. I’ve taken this week off to spend with loved ones and to reflect on the many things that I hold dear. I want to recognize your role in my life and how having you in this community has been truly rewarding. Thank you for your comments and your suggestions. I hope you can spend this time with those who bring you love and comfort. I look forward sharing my reservoir!
The fog is slowly lifting. I’m re-integrating parts of my life that I put on hold while I was going through the election (expressing myself through my caring and feeding of friends and family, enjoying art, and finding joy in new cultural experiences). I know that there is a new reality. I know that I need to prepare for things to come. We are restless, yet we need rest. There is guilt for wanting to participate in simple pleasures while others are being traumatized. I’m still reconciling those parts of my life. I’m going to practice self-care and remind myself of the flight safety announcements that tell you that should you need oxygen, please put your oxygen mask on first before assisting others. I hope you do the same.
Here’s Tuesday Truths!
In light of this past week, there have been an increase of hate crimes so if you find yourself in the position to help others being subjected to this kind of harassment, here’s a guide to help in the situation. Here’s also a video that gives you practical ways to be an ally and combat racism. The Southern Poverty Law Center also has a guide on how to respond to everyday bigotry. **I know that it’s tiring and we feel defeated. The more we help one another, the less that we’ll feel small and retreat. You are BRAVE and we each have a light to shine.**
How important is social trust when it comes to having an impact on society? I learned a great deal from this article, however I would add my 2 cents in that although the US has experienced low social distrust in the past (the discrimination of Germans, Irish, & Italians), the people who were immigrating to the US didn’t look that much different than the people who distrusted them. African Americans, Latinos, AAPIs – we look visibly different and that creates social bias almost immediately. When you hear people talk about how fortunate they are to be “White Latinos” that tells you that being “passable” has a lot to do with how people perceive you.
If this campaign cycle has rocked your psyche, let me reassure you that you’re not alone. I felt this kind of desolation after the 2000 campaign. It made me question whether it was all worth it. At that point, I had already stepped out of politics (my quarter life crisis) and made a commitment to go back in only to find myself on the losing side. What if you also wonder if there’s a life outside of politics because you were also meant to do multiple careers throughout your life? Here’s a terrific read on what it means to have more than one true calling.
I know that you’re accustomed to Tuesday Truths so thank you for indulging me this additional post and if I start to ramble, it’s likely because my brain hasn’t quite geared up since I’ve had about 3 hours sleep.
It feels like I’m on an emotional roller coaster going from despair, disbelief, disappointment, and the urge to fight. I know that I’m not ready to fight another day right now. It rings hollow because I haven’t given myself the space to absorb this new reality. A lot of you are probably feeling similar reactions and I encourage you to allow yourself the time to recharge and be surrounded by your tribe. Love on them and one another. Be kind to yourself and give each other the time we all need to process these emotions in the ways that are most beneficial to each of us.
We have invested time and energy to building a country where inclusivity and social justice/equality levels the field for all and to see our fellow citizens choose divisiveness, xenophobia, and sexism cuts me to the core. We are a nation that celebrates its diversity (we have a record number of diverse women serving as U.S. Senators in the next Congress – Senators Elect Tammy Duckworth, Kamala Harris, & Catherine Cortez Masto) and breaking barriers (First Vietnamese American woman in Congress with Congresswoman Elect Stephanie Murphy; First African American woman to serve in the Delaware delegation, Congresswoman Elect Lisa Blunt Rochester; First Somali American to serve in the country as a member of the Minnesota State Legislature, State Representative Elect Ilhan Omar). These accomplishments are to be applauded and reminds me that our country values our diverse voices in the conversation. These women will be in the room where it happens and I hope that they will take us with them (they’re going to need reinforcements!).
Maintaining hope is difficult when the darkest of days are upon us. You’re probably feeling drained and exhausted. I hope that you’ll keep in mind the people who you may have connected with while on this journey, complete strangers who may live in places that you may have never thought to visit or know. We’re rooted in our ability to welcome love into our hearts from all sources.
Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts and I am thankful for the community that we’ve created. **group hug**
In the meantime, let’s all hold onto the words of the indefatigable Rep. John Lewis,”….those of us who are committed to the cause of justice need to pace ourselves because our struggle does not last for one day, one week or one year, but it is the struggle of a lifetime, and each generation must do its part. There will be progress, but there will also be setbacks. We must continue to have hope and be steeled in our faith . . .”
So how appropriate that this is the 45th version of 2016’s Tuesday Truths and we’re on the cusp of electing our 45th POTUS? Of course, you should know who I’m supporting so I have one thing to say – VOTE!
Send me your selfies that you voted! Thanks for reading/sharing!
One more week! I’m looking forward to closing this chapter of the 2016 election and optimistic for what’s to come. In the meantime, here’s Tuesday Truths!
Most of you know that I volunteer with the Women’s Information Network (WIN) — check out their newly designed webpage! — and one of the objectives is to create an environment where women can find mentors organically and maintain a deep relationship so that it’s beneficial to all those involved. What’s important to remember is that regardless of where you are in life, you can always help those who are in the beginning stages of their career. If you’re a staff assistant, you would know the trials and tribulations of working as a junior member of a team. You can help those who are looking for their first jobs after school and it would be meaningful to them to know how you navigated to your 1st professional gig. We all have the ability to pay it forward. It’s a matter of us taking the time and if you’re not sure how to go about it, you can take a look at these mentoring tips.
In my 20s, I spent a short amount of time out of my current field to entertain the idea of trying something new. I switched career paths and found that although my new position was interesting, it wasn’t particularly fulfilling. I decided to go back into politics and I think there’s going to be more career changes in my future! If you decide to make a change, here are stories from 8 women who learned what it meant to make a career change.
Life is never perfect. Your professional life isn’t always going to be perfect, no matter how many times you think that you’ve achieved your goal of obtaining the “perfect” job. Learning to cope with the obstacles will allow you to maneuver the bumps as you move forward in life. There will be times when you need to exercise your brain to re-focus when you’re facing a challenging time. All it takes is 3 seconds to find your joy!
Making friends can be a daunting task, especially when you get older. Social media these days has allowed us to get better with making connections that are real, although not necessarily IRL. I’ve had some delightful conversations with people who I frequently talk with on twitter or instagram and even though we haven’t met IRL, I know that I would find them to be as interesting. When you’re in the flesh, making friends is really a ritualistic form of courting someone. How do you know? By making an impression through interaction. My closest friends aren’t in the area anymore so I’ve had to adjust to finding new relationships that would make life a bit happier.
I’m all for more women running for office. If you’re progressive and also from a community of color then I’m all even more for it! One of the things that we’ve learned about engaging women to run as a candidate is that it takes multiple overtures for us to get women to run. We face self doubt and a huge case of imposter syndrome. So how can you help in closing the confidence gap? Encourage a woman to run!
Is this another Year of the Woman, where Congress gets an influx of women elected officials? Will it help to fix Congress in having more women legislators? According to this study, Democrats will not have a problem in encouraging women to run, however the GOP will face a massive crisis if they continue to lose women in their recruitment.
So I gotta close out this week’s edition with an article written by Tanya Tarr on defining trust in negotiation. I was recently a part of a speed mentoring event and we touched on negotiation as part of what you’ll have to face as you progress into your careers. Ask these 4 questions each time to test the waters of trust.