Tuesday Truths 2017 Edition v23

Can you believe that half of 2017 has already passed? We’re 6 months into this calendar year and yet it seems like it’s been forever. I don’t know about you, but I feel like we’re in a constant battle and to be perfectly honest, my brain and entire being is feeling a bit weathered from the barrage. I’ve been politically active for over 20+ years as a professional operative and if you count the years I spent as a student activist, even more time being involved in the issues of the day. My everyday life revolves around politics and political empowerment so it’s not unusual to be acutely aware of the challenges that we face as women and as a woman of color. Everything at this moment in time feels extremely amplified and charged. My friendships are based around my professional life so to step away from political life can be challenging because I surround myself from people who are just as passionate about the issues. So I find myself forcibly taking breaks that take me out of politics. As a result, I’m taking the time to pause and recharge in settings outside of DC, even during the work week. Taking this time allows me to re-center and think with more clarity. If you don’t have the ability to remove yourself from an environment, I hope you can find a way to find an oasis to give yourself the ability to exhale.

Here’s Tuesday Truths!

  • Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good is something that I strive towards although I’m more than likely to want perfection to be a goal. The need for perfection is something I have tried to squash because as a child, I got straight As and had so much stress about disappointing people that it would sometimes create paralysis. I still try my hardest to be my best self, whether it’s learning more about a specific topic or doing new things because I still don’t think I’m a fully formed person, maybe 80% set in my ways and the rest learning how to evolve. So the idea of being flawless might be cornered by the very few, it’s not necessarily the mindset that I want to take for myself. Enjoying the good in a flawed life is OK because I can be happy with what I have and be in the moment. Striving for better is nice and it can be ambitious, but I won’t let it keep me from feeling blessed for what I’ve achieved.

*******

  • Bad habits can be hard to break. The more you understand the root cause of these types of habits, the better chance you will have in re-setting your life. Mindfulness is how you begin changing those habits. I have found that life is a series of choices and how you decide to pursue your choices is really the deciding factor. Bad habits are really choices that are sometimes made without real contemplation. So much of life requires self reflection. People ask for my help about their brand but if you haven’t taken the time to think about it yourself, no one can really help you. We can coax you to think about certain aspects but the actual decision of what you want for yourself can ultimately only be decided by you. Punishing yourself isn’t going to help the situation (see above post about perfection). Recognizing what triggers these habits will help to better understand the emotions that cause you do something. Breaking the cycle begins with stopping yourself just so you can notice the negative things that are happening.

*******

*******

  • I have the mantra of #livinahappylife and that means living it the way that I find the most fulfilling. For a moment in my mid 20s, I needed to remember what fueled my passion. I have never believed in destiny, the idea that it’s pre-determined that you would do something or there’s a master plan. There are times when society will place pressure on you to be defined by what you’re doing or where you work. No longer giving F*cks is so important to finding your own happiness, even when what you may doing is actualizing your life. Life isn’t meant to be perfect, it’s meant to be lived so that you can enjoy all the things that surround you.

*******

  • Everyone always talks about how multi-tasking is completely useless. Yet, I find on job descriptions the ability to multi-task is part of the requirements portion (I will need to review my own firm’s job descriptions for interns and associates to REMOVE that piece.). I work on so many projects that a majority of the time, I find that we never get from A-Z on a project because there are so many hiccups. Does that count as multi-tasking? The word has been so over-used that it’s hard for me to think of my work life as nothing more than a connection of actions that are dependent on others to do what’s necessary for me to move on the next action to completion. This all being said, there’s a time management strategy called kanban that can eliminate multi-tasking and get you to a more focused way of completing projects.

*******

  • When your work life has got you DOWN, remember Toni Morrison has the reminders about your worth. Living in DC, people like to tie our identities to the jobs that we have and it takes a lot of effort to not allow that connection be the criteria of how you value yourself. You can also stop the cycle! When you meet people for the 1st time, talk about their interests, not about what they do or who/where they work – life is so much more and don’t let others determine that value for you.

*******

Got a comment? Drop me a note below, on Facebook, or twitter! Thanks for reading/sharing and I’ll see you here next Tuesday!

— Madalene

Post a comment

You may use the following HTML:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>