Tag Archives: mentoring

Tuesday Truths 2017 Edition v4

I hope you’re energized after January 21st. Seeing all of the fierce women & feminist men from around the world in my social media at the Womens March has been heartwarming & gives me hope for having allies in the challenges ahead. I enjoyed being in New Orleans because I got to meet one of my Tulane/Newcomb Institute mentees in person & help her with her professional goals. Sharing my experiences with future generations of women leaders allows me to welcome those who are willing to share in the struggles & the work towards equity for all women. Minh Ngoc Nguyen was gracious enough to introduce me to wonderful people from the Vietnamese American community who bring resilience & add vibrancy to the New Orleans community such as the co-owners of Drip Affogato Juley Le & Anh T Vu & community leader Anna Nguyen. I’m thrilled to see how they are using their talents to bring awareness to issues important to all members of society. I have The Mister to thank for taking time to the Bywater area so that I could take this pic (if you have the time to read it, I highly recommend it). It reminds us that it will take sacrifice to protect those whose rights are trampled. Civil disobedience and calling out individuals/groups who think that we will stay silent is necessary in creating equality for all of us. We rise together.

Here’s Tuesday Truths!

  • I started journaling more so that I could better recognize emotions from my day and better understand how the root of my emotions affects my work. Described as emotional agility, it allows you to be more productive so you can assess the meanings behind your emotions. Here’s where you can evaluate those emotions and take necessary steps to increase your chances for wellness.
  • I’ve had to go on a news detox because it was just too much. I’m pretty vigilant about the news sources that I read/watch so when I share materials, I try to vet them before I share any links. The uptick of fake news got me wondering how they were able to get so far in spreading non-facts and luckily, Melissa Ryan not only shares how these “news stories” were used as a form of attack but also how we can use their same tactics to spread legitimate stories.

Thanks for reading/sharing. Got a tip that you want to share? Send it to me! See you here next Tuesday!

— Madalene

Tuesday Truths 2017 Edition v3

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We’re in the last days of the Obama administration. My husband and I went to a reception at the White House on Monday night to celebrate the work of those who served in the Administration for 8 years. My husband, who I call The Mister, was one of those faithful public servants. It was a wonderful way to start the week, acknowledging all of the energy spent in improving the lives of the American people on behalf of President Obama. The President addressed the crowd and gave thanks for their endurance for sticking it out for those 8 years. I do the political side of things, so it’s nice to see policy in action. Can you tell that I’m super proud of The Mister? He has served in 2 Democratic Administrations so this isn’t his first rodeo when it comes to ending one Administration and transitioning to another where the opposing Party is coming in – the last time we had to do this was in 2000 and since then, he has learned a great deal in his management skills and how to motivate his team. As the Chief of Staff of an agency, he has had to deal with crisis management, personnel issues, as well as working to help improve peoples’ lives. Because isn’t that what we really strive towards, those of us who work in politics or policy? To help bring public policy to the people in an everyday way.

As we head out of DC, there are those who are coming into town for the Womens’ March so we bid you good weather, a safe place to express your views and the spirit of camaraderie. We’re in this together and for the long haul. We’ll see you for the next go around.

Here’s Tuesday Truths!

  • Saturday’s a big day so planning ahead on what to wear is equally is important as planning what signs you’ll be carrying. You’ll want comfortable shoes and layers so that you can shed layers if the walk gets your temperature rising. Here are additional tips that can be helpful when you’re planning what to wear for a protest march in winter, not only for comfort but also to make it easier should there be random security sweeps. Good luck!
  • I recently commented on a post of a friend/colleague who shared her long history of work within the progressive movement as well as within the Democratic Party. I acknowledged that she was a mentor and role model for so many women organizers because since she was in a senior leadership position during a time when there weren’t that many women leaders, she helped to amplify and elevate our voices. I’ve lived through 2000 when the Democratic Party was astounded to find itself back in the desert after experiencing 8 years of the Clinton Administration and prior to that 12 years of being locked out of the White House. We are at a place where we need more mentors not only lifting fellow women voices but also teaching the next generation how to survive the desert. When women come to me for advice, I try to give them a perspective of what their actions mean not only to their personal goals, but also how it affects those who come behind them. Why? Because I feel that I have a responsibility to them just like they have a responsibility to those after them to make it a bit easier and that domino affect reverberates to not just women of our generation and ethnicity, but to all of us regardless of those factors. Melissa Harris-Perry calls it activist mentoring and she’s got a list of inspiring women who have done just that for others.
  • I love brainstorming and bringing ideas to reality. Trust me – this sh*z is HARD. There are times when the most brilliant of ideas never make it because the execution is so challenging. Remember when Barack Obama (the dude with the funny name?!?) was running for US Senate? It takes a lot of belief in the idea or of oneself to get others to believe and to convince others that it’s more than just pie in the sky. When you’ve got a great idea, here are the things you must do to make it real.
  • Instead of managing your time, how about managing your energy? I really enjoyed reading this article because it reminds me so much about the link between the alignment of company and staff values. I run a small shop but we can get extremely busy which results in directives and not a lot of time for explaining procedures or the Why (an idea of which I’m a big proponent). To counterbalance some of that crazy, I established a weekly staff lunch so that we would remove ourselves from our work and take the time to get to know one another and to ask questions about why we do things a certain way and learn new ideas. It allows us to get re-focused and re-energized on projects. If we have a late night due to work events and if we don’t have early morning fundraisers then we have a bit more flexibility of coming into the office. When organizations align with the values of the individuals who work there then you have more committed staff. Being able to bring body, mind, emotion and human spirit together equates to a more better performing individuals. Happier, healthier & more focused employees – who doesn’t want to be in that kind of environment?
  • We talked a little about being healthier in previous posts regarding 2017 – how about bringing some hobbies back into your life? What’s that?? Yeah, I know – I’m doing an awful job in committing to my own hobbies (maintaining French lessons) but there are 8 creative hobbies that you can do that are fun (French is fun, I promise!). Embroidery and cross stitch were 2 things that I used to do when I was a teenager. Maybe I can add it to my list again!
  • If you’re planning to hibernate this winter, why not include some SHEro documentaries into your playlist? Get streaming and get inspired!

Thanks for reading/sharing and if you get a minute, LIKE Arum Group on Facebook! See you back here on next Tuesday (I’m going to need a group hug – it will be the start of the new administration).

— Madalene

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v49

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I’m traveling down a path of change, not necessarily unwanted. Election outcome aside, I’m about to embrace a professional change in my own career so the opportunities that lie ahead of me are ones that will evolve with my own set of goals. I find myself facing a lot of uncertainty, where my professional identity is no longer fixed to the individual elected officials that I once represented. There’s a lot of freedom in re-designing my own brand and I look forward to the challenges and opportunities that await me.

Let’s get to Tuesday Truths!

  • Mindfulness has been a catch phrase when it comes to leadership. How useful is it if people aren’t learning how to use all facets of it? Mindfulness trainings are necessary so that people can learn how to address the 3 essential items to be more successful in leadership.
  • A majority of the people who have worked as associates on my team were usually recent college graduates and my office was their 1st experience in a professional setting. One of the 1st things that happens when joining a team is to earn your manager’s respect. Here are tips where you can make sure that you’re getting recognized for your work and how managers can better communicate their goals so that everyone gets a common result.
  • Looking for more ways to be productive? These slides can help break some mental barriers so that you can have better time management.
  • “It’s better to thank someone for the room they make for you than to apologize for taking up space in their lives.” – casual gratitude can make people feel better and some cases, live longer!
  • One of things that we learn on campaigns is that there are only 3 resources: people, time and money and the most important resource is time. It’s limited and extremely valuable because you can’t get anymore of it. So when you think about your own time, you have to be judicious on how you allocate it. Learning to say no on your time can be daunting so we’e got some ideas on how you can diplomatically decline.
  • When I was in mid twenties, I had my quarter life crisis and as a result, I burned out of politics. I was no longer interested in my selected career and decided to pursue something entirely different. When we work in stressful environments, the possibility of burning out increases so we always need to find personalized solutions to help us avoid the burnout. What do you do so that you can manage your stress?

Thanks for reading/sharing and if you have helpful tips, please let me know!

— Madalene

 

 

 

 

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v48

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I hope that you had a relaxing holiday! I’m ready to tackle the next few weeks so that I can mentally prepare for 2017. Tis the season for reflection and setting goals. So let’s take a look at Tuesday Truths to see how we can jump start the new year.

  • Sometimes when you set goals and not meet them, you wonder if they were too lofty or question if you have the stamina to reach them. What’s important is to realize that you need to set your goals that motivate you to achieve them vs make you more frustrated. Here are a few tips that you can use so that you can make those goals achievable as well as keep you moving towards the bigger picture.
  • With the new year comes a fresh start and there are times when we take risks to shake things up a bit so how do you make a risky move less risky? Before you jump into the deep end, you can do “life design interviews” to see if a change in careers is really in the cards for you. Something I probably should have done when I had my quarter life crisis!
  • Women have a more challenging environment in our professional careers because it’s not the social norm to have a life that includes family and professional achievement all rolled into one. We are questioned about our priorities of having children over the financial bottom line for the companies where we work. It’s a time in our lives when we start to question how do we prioritize? How does this connect with our personal achievements and goals? Ambition isn’t a dirty word. It’s also important to recognize that women have complicated roles in society and when we’re placed in positions where men are the norm, there are societal pressures that put women in a bind. We are constantly asserting ourselves while trying to please everyone else.

Thanks for reading/sharing and if you have any tips that you care to add, please share!

— Madalene

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v47

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It’s been 2 weeks since the Election and I’m still recovering. I’ve taken this week off to spend with loved ones and to reflect on the many things that I hold dear. I want to recognize your role in my life and how having you in this community has been truly rewarding. Thank you for your comments and your suggestions. I hope you can spend this time with those who bring you love and comfort. I look forward sharing my reservoir!

Thank you

Here’s Tuesday Truths!

Continue reading →

The Day After

Hi Everyone –

I know that you’re accustomed to Tuesday Truths so thank you for indulging me this additional post and if I start to ramble, it’s likely because my brain hasn’t quite geared up since I’ve had about 3 hours sleep.

It feels like I’m on an emotional roller coaster going from despair, disbelief, disappointment, and the urge to fight. I know that I’m not ready to fight another day right now. It rings hollow because I haven’t given myself the space to absorb this new reality. A lot of you are probably feeling similar reactions and I encourage you to allow yourself the time to recharge and be surrounded by your tribe. Love on them and one another. Be kind to yourself and give each other the time we all need to process these emotions in the ways that are most beneficial to each of us.

We have invested time and energy to building a country where inclusivity and social justice/equality levels the field for all and to see our fellow citizens choose divisiveness, xenophobia, and sexism cuts me to the core. We are a nation that celebrates its diversity (we have a record number of diverse women serving as U.S. Senators in the next Congress – Senators Elect Tammy Duckworth, Kamala Harris, & Catherine Cortez Masto) and breaking barriers (First Vietnamese American woman in Congress with Congresswoman Elect Stephanie Murphy; First African American woman to serve in the Delaware delegation, Congresswoman Elect Lisa Blunt Rochester; First Somali American to serve in the country as a member of the Minnesota State Legislature, State Representative Elect Ilhan Omar). These accomplishments are to be applauded and reminds me that our country values our diverse voices in the conversation. These women will be in the room where it happens and I hope that they will take us with them (they’re going to need reinforcements!).

Maintaining hope is difficult when the darkest of days are upon us. You’re probably feeling drained and exhausted. I hope that you’ll keep in mind the people who you may have connected with while on this journey, complete strangers who may live in places that you may have never thought to visit or know. We’re rooted in our ability to welcome love into our hearts from all sources.

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts and I am thankful for the community that we’ve created. **group hug**

In the meantime, let’s all hold onto the words of the indefatigable Rep. John Lewis,”….those of us who are committed to the cause of justice need to pace ourselves because our struggle does not last for one day, one week or one year, but it is the struggle of a lifetime, and each generation must do its part. There will be progress, but there will also be setbacks. We must continue to have hope and be steeled in our faith . . .”

–Madalene

 

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v44

One more week! I’m looking forward to closing this chapter of the 2016 election and optimistic for what’s to come. In the meantime, here’s Tuesday Truths!

  • Most of you know that I volunteer with the Women’s Information Network (WIN) — check out their newly designed webpage! — and one of the objectives is to create an environment where women can find mentors organically and maintain a deep relationship so that it’s beneficial to all those involved. What’s important to remember is that regardless of where you are in life, you can always help those who are in the beginning stages of their career. If you’re a staff assistant, you would know the trials and tribulations of working as a junior member of a team. You can help those who are looking for their first jobs after school and it would be meaningful to them to know how you navigated to your 1st professional gig. We all have the ability to pay it forward. It’s a matter of us taking the time and if you’re not sure how to go about it, you can take a look at these mentoring tips.
  • In my 20s, I spent a short amount of time out of my current field to entertain the idea of trying something new. I switched career paths and found that although my new position was interesting, it wasn’t particularly fulfilling. I decided to go back into politics and I think there’s going to be more career changes in my future! If you decide to make a change, here are stories from 8 women who learned what it meant to make a career change.
  • Life is never perfect. Your professional life isn’t always going to be perfect, no matter how many times you think that you’ve achieved your goal of obtaining the “perfect” job. Learning to cope with the obstacles will allow you to maneuver the bumps as you move forward in life. There will be times when you need to exercise your brain to re-focus when you’re facing a challenging time. All it takes is 3 seconds to find your joy!
  • Making friends can be a daunting task, especially when you get older. Social media these days has allowed us to get better with making connections that are real, although not necessarily IRL. I’ve had some delightful conversations with people who I frequently talk with on twitter or instagram and even though we haven’t met IRL, I know that I would find them to be as interesting. When you’re in the flesh, making friends is really a ritualistic form of courting someone. How do you know? By making an impression through interaction. My closest friends aren’t in the area anymore so I’ve had to adjust to finding new relationships that would make life a bit happier.
  • I’m all for more women running for office. If you’re progressive and also from a community of color then I’m all even more for it! One of the things that we’ve learned about engaging women to run as a candidate is that it takes multiple overtures for us to get women to run. We face self doubt and a huge case of imposter syndrome. So how can you help in closing the confidence gap? Encourage a woman to run!
  • Is this another Year of the Woman, where Congress gets an influx of women elected officials? Will it help to fix Congress in having more women legislators? According to this study, Democrats will not have a problem in encouraging women to run, however the GOP will face a massive crisis if they continue to lose women in their recruitment.
  • So I gotta close out this week’s edition with an article written by Tanya Tarr on defining trust in negotiation. I was recently a part of a speed mentoring event and we touched on negotiation as part of what you’ll have to face as you progress into your careers. Ask these 4 questions each time to test the waters of trust.

One more week! Thanks for reading/sharing!

— Madalene

 

 

 

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v42

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Taking deep breaths! I hope you’re having a great week! I’m ready for Election Day and to head out for a break. Any suggestions on someplace warm I can visit? Remember to give yourself time to decompress and to give yourself self-care. If you don’t take care of yourself, then you can’t take care of others!

Here’s Tuesday Truths!

  • Have you been listening to the Mentoring Moments podcast? It’s great and has excellent stories/interviews on how successful women from multiple generations reached their goals. The most recent interview was with the Editor of Chief of Seventeen magazine, Ann Shoket and she’s dropping knowledge on how she got to her current position (after her 3rd attempt!). It’s the journey, people!
  • I’m always looking for ways to help people network (myself included). You can get into a rut that may be comfortable but is it really effective? Here are a few tips for a better introduction. What do you think?
  • I recently had a conversation with a friend who told me that she appreciated my habit of learning new things or at the very least trying new hobbies. I’ve talked before that I’m a Jill of all trades and a master of nothing (basically because I have so many different interests). I think regardless of how long you spend on a hobby and how deeply you delve into it, that hobby is always going to make you more well, interesting. I love people who are passionate about learning something and go all in and become experts (I know who to call when it’s time to hire someone for calligraphy!). I also love the people who take an interest in learning how to play an instrument, only to find that a couple weeks/months later they’ve changed to a different hobby to pursue. It’s all good! As adults who aren’t required to attend school for educational purposes, we’re learning to enrich ourselves and isn’t that what life should be about anyway? If you don’t have time that’s fine too. Life is about spending it however way you want. If that includes changing interests every few days/weeks/months then more joy to you in your pursuit!
  • I was having lunch with a friend who is working a side hustle. There are a lot of things to think about when you start a business and even more work when you’re doing it on the side while maintaining your current work load. Here are some things to think about when you’re working your magic.
  • Since I kinda live in a bubble (majority of my friends are progressive and partisan), I tend to not meet people who are in support of Mr. Trump. With that context, it helps to realize that with any situation where you have disagreement, it helps to ease people onto an exit strategy so that they have room to move in that direction. When you box people into a corner, it’s more common that they will want to dig deeper into their beliefs and fight. This isn’t about providing more evidence or facts/data. It’s about giving people who are in disagreement the space to change course without punishment. It takes a lot of patience on the part of the individual to keep an open mind towards this discipline. The urge to fight back will be overwhelming. This going to be a long road ahead after this election and it’s all a part of the process of unifying this country.

Thanks for reading/sharing! Let me know if you have any tips you care to share!

— Madalene

 

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v41

This has been a roller coaster ride of an election! Having worked in politics as an operative for over 20 years, this made me re-consider my profession. People already think that I work in a “dirty” business and add to it, I deal with money so that in itself connotes “pay to play” or “quid pro quo”, ideas that I do not advocate within my work (I ain’t going to jail for anyone!). The tone for this election has been unbelievable. I am reminded that in earlier campaigns, prior to email, twitter and all the other social media platforms, days when it was in the halls, pubs and parlors where people gathered, ideas and reputations were defended and propagated, a lot of unkind things were said. Politics has always been a rough and tumble profession. It’s for those who are tough skinned and determined to push forth an agenda that may not be that popular. I think of the disadvantaged and of those who are under represented. I have the privilege of working in this industry and I will do all that I can so that there are others like me bringing awareness to our leaders so that they know that people should be respected for their worth everyday. There are no 2nd class citizens and your skin color, sexual preference, gender, or religious beliefs should never be discriminated. For those who believe in the agenda that the Republican presidential nominee brings forth, I will be there to make sure it doesn’t happen. I chose this profession because I thought that I could make a difference and if that means being at the front lines to remind people that we’re all Americans, even when we don’t look a certain way, then you will find me there.

In the meantime, Tuesday Truths!

  • I spend a lot of time reassuring people. Raising money does that to you when you’re looking at an awfully BIG number to make your goals. So there are times when I need to reassure myself that I’m not smoking crack to think that my team and I can achieve a goal or that we’re just badass (because obvi, we are!). Encouragement from within means so much so when you start to hear the obnoxious voice of doubt, learn to listen to the voice that tells you that you’re more than OK.
  • So ignoring my opening for this week’s post, I know that every cycle I reach peak burnout as we collide with the deadline of Election. Adrenaline fuels my get-up-and-go vs the passion that pushes me through to see results. I also go more inward and that results in less time with friends and loved ones. When you think burnout, you think that it will happen in the older years of your life. I felt it when I had my “quarter life crisis” and my entire work ethic was well below it’s usual height. Regardless of industry, watch for the signs and hopefully all of us will recognize how to best retain people in our respective fields so that they continue performing at a level that everyone deems excellent.
  • Looking for mentors and role models can be challenging for women and for communities of color. Here’s a great resource of what to do when you need to improve in a certain area of skill. Observation is key in making mental note of how you want to accomplish tasks and be perceived.

Hope all is well in your world! Thanks for reading/sharing and if you know of someone who thinks these posts are spectacular, ask them to subscribe!

— Madalene

 

 

 

Tuesday Truths 2016 Edition v40

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Congress has left the building! We’re out hustlin’ for the last few weeks until the Election. Silly Season is in full swing and we’re up for all it (just barely!). Register and Vote, people! Here’s Tuesday Truths!

  • When you get to be 83 years young, you get to share your thoughts on what’s up with life. Regardless of how you may feel about Notorious RBG, you need to respect that she reached the pinnacle of a law career that many strive to achieve during a time when women didn’t work outside of the home, let alone work in the legal profession. She’s dropping knowledge about being a mother while also attending law school & how collegiality plays a crucial role in bringing differing opinions to the table with respect.
  • I can be on the road a lot and when I travel, I feel the pressure to bring the same kind of work hours to wherever I travel (including trips to the west coast and Hawaii) where the time difference can be killer. I’ve had to wake up at the crack of dawn (beautiful sunrises, Hawaii!) to get onto weekly conference calls because who cares that you’re on the road for another client? It works to my advantage because when I am that far away, I can usually get a lot of work done and the rest of the day is mine because the east coast has already called it a day. I come well stocked with power strips and the usual battery packs to keep my electronic devices juiced up. If you need advice on how to get work done when you travel, especially internationally, visit my friend Tammy Gordon’s post on the 7 things she learned about working abroad.
  • We know that women have a pay disparity to our male colleagues. What happens when you’re a woman and overweight? There is definite discrimination concerning weight and it’s making it more challenging for women to equalize compensation.
  • Women have a tendency to feel imposter syndrome so when you need to find confidence in your work, reach for this article. Ranging from being not afraid to ask to trusting your own vision, each individual has meaningful tips to coax the confidence that we know exists inside each of us.
  • This is one of the BEST articles on networking that I could possibly share. I’m not a high profile person and I get a ton of requests to meet from within my network (my friends and colleagues asking me to meet with their contacts or people think I would have good advice to offer). I’m more than happy to help but there are moments when I can’t even with the people who have met with me and then don’t acknowledge the time that I’ve given to talk with them about professional development. When I’m doing my own networking and I’m asking someone to HELP me, then I’m going to express my gratitude and pay for their coffee/tea/cocktail/lunch for taking the time and educating me on a particular topic. It’s not cool to be a networking parasite so heed these tips!
  • Are you an introvert preparing for a job interview? Here are 4 ways you can harness your energy to have a successful interaction. You can never be overly prepared! People sometimes ask if I feel like “I’m always on” because I joke that I hate people (seriously I don’t) but I’m an ambivert who doesn’t have a problem making small talk (I do that everyday with fundraising) but I really enjoy the company of a small group of friends and just being alone. Imagine trying to be your best self with a group of strangers in an interview? Maybe that’s why I own my own firm LOL 🙂
  • It’s not Wednesday yet but I’m looking forward to my #WCW on Yuh-Line Niou and bonus, she’s in Vogue! #AOFPowerOfShe

Thanks for reading/sharing and if this has been useful, encourage your friends to subscribe!

–Madalene